Weekend of wonderful

This weekend was great!!  I got to go out with some friends who get together once a month and gab all night:)  Saturday, I had a few friends and some kids over for lunch and gabbed some more:)  Who doesn't like to talk all day?

With my tummy still in knots, (and Luke coughing like crazy) we decided to skip church and relax Sunday.  Relax I did:)  I got off the couch a couple of times, but not for anything important!!  That, my friend, is the way to get some sanity back. 

Unfortunately, my week just continues to get more and more full.  All good stuff, but it makes me glad I got that couch time.  Can't wait to see what this coming weekend brings:)

Can't you tell I'm ready for anything?

Just one of those days

Today I have been an emotional wreck.  It started last night, actually, with the nausea and light-headed feelings that I have learned are my body's way of showing stress.  So I think back over the last week or so and put my finger on a few stressors.  Problem is, I can't do much about most of them.  Life stinks sometimes.  I like the sign up the street that says, "When life gives you lemons, give the lemons to God."  I have obviously not been doing that.  We'll label that Project #1.

So I lay around all morning just wishing away the nausea.  An old friend IM'd me on FB--that was a welcome surprise:)  I finally forced myself to get up and in the shower.  Sometimes it makes me feel better, other times not so much.  Today was a not so much kinda day.  I really needed to get some errands run before my kids got out of school early.  After forcing myself out the door, I get to the store and realize that what I need to purchase is not fresh-looking.  It was an errand for a dear friend of mine who recently moved to Good Ole' Miss.  So I call her.  We end up not getting what I came for but continue talking.  I get to another store when she drops the bomb question: "Are you doing alright?"  Just to give you a visual--I am weeping in a parking lot with wadded up tissues trying desperately to not have anyone see the snot. 

Then, she takes the time to pray for me right there on the phone.  God has obviously blessed me with this friendship, and I couldn't help but think it was ironic when she asked the Lord to send someone encouraging my way.  SHE WAS MY ENCOURAGEMENT.  I have not voiced the issue with many others, but she has always been there for me, giving me advice, and reminding me to continue fighting Satan.

Thanks, Peg--I love you :)

I must wonder, have I ever been that encouraging to anyone?

Live to Ski:)

I got back from skiing on Sunday.  What a trip!!  I LOVE TO SKI:)  My poor body had had it by Saturday night.  I basically skiied, ate, and slept.  That's a vacation, folks!

I don't think I've ever been away from my kids that long (of my choice).  It felt weird.  I think my kids are getting to that age where I don't worry about them as much when they're away from me.  I'm sure sending them to school has had something to do with that :)  I love them so much, but I can certainly enjoy some adults-only times.

Going back to that whole not worrying thing I said--I do realize that the time is coming where I will worry myself sick about what they're doing when they aren't with me.  I have been trying to mentally prepare myself for the driving years.  Plus, that's what they make Prozac for, right?

Clear the Way for New Growth

Today's weather is to die for!!  I got to go outside and rake and turn soil in my veggie garden.  My hubby prefers to mulch most of the leaves into the grass, which is fine because it means less work for me:)  But, my flower beds don't get mowed . . . obviously.  So, I leave the leaves in the flower beds until Spring so I don't have to mulch twice--I'm cheap. 

SO, today I rake and rake and rake until I realize that the fence is getting tangled up with dead vines and leaves.  A couple of years ago, chainsaw in hand, my hubby and the kids and I worked on the "other side of the fence" for almost an entire day getting things cleaned up and beautified.  It was wonderful.  Now I'm seeing that I'm going to have to schedule in some maintenance:(  One of this kids' chores is picking up sticks and disposing of them over said fence, but they are apparently inefficient at the whole throwing part.  I need to get out there and show them how to throw like a javelin (spelling?).  When I got on the other side today I realized the sticks were piled up underneath some new but dead growth.  So what I had was a layer of sticks, a layer of vine-like growth, and another layer of sticks.   YUCK!!  I worked hard getting things untangled and sorted.

I was finished!!  I stepped back and surveyed my hard work--just to discover you couldn't even tell I had been out there.  I'm assuming that it's better than before, but I can't tell.  Come to think of it, a lot of my daily life is like that.  I wake up, get kids off to school then clean the house of all evidence that someone actually lives here.  Nobody notices that the three pairs of shoes and box of spilled crayons are no longer in the living room.  They just know that now they have space to get dirty again:)  I just have to keep telling myself that although what I do may go unappreciated, it's obviously not appreciated when I don't do it.  So, I will continue to daily maintain the chaos and make life easier for those whom I serve, and I will remind myself to  smile--because I know I worked hard and accomplished something today.

I guess if life stayed clean and uncluttered, there would be no room for new growth like the vines that cover my fence and make it beautiful all summer:)  Beauty IS in the eye of the beholder.

Lonely House

I pass this house every Tuesday and Friday on my way to work.  I have known this house as far back as I can remember.  It is in a curve on a backroad where there are no other houses, down in a low spot a short walk from a wonderful creek.  I always considered it creepy.  Now that I've aged a little, it no longer creeps me out, but rather saddens me.  This house deserves love, care, and a family to use it.  But now it's far beyond repair, destined to become a heap on the ground when a good stiff wind hits just right. 

Things like this make me so curious: why did this house get abandoned?  Did the owners have to foreclose; was the owner an elderly individual who had to move to a nursing home?  Why would a perfectly good house become forgotten and abandoned?

Which brings me to a thought I've been rolling around in the empty space above my shoulders;)-- Why do I allow myself to become lonely?  I find myself wanting to call somebody up to go for lunch, but then can't decide who might want to go.  I have many acquaintances, but few FRIENDS.  Women I could call and know would drop whatever they are doing to let me cry on a shoulder.  Women who can help figure out a problem or give advice when my kids or husband frustrate me.

A few years ago, I made a decision that I would no longer continue to push a friendship where I was the only one doing the "work".  I felt it was unhealthy. . . and it was.  So, I was very lonely for a while; until one day I broke down in my prayer with the realization that I was not allowing God to be my bestie.  It was a lighning bolt!  I shared this info with 2 friends who had made the commitment to praying with and for each other daily.  I began to realize I was minimizing how people felt compared to what they were able to do or how much time they were able to pour into a relationship.  And that's what it is--a relationship where perhaps me being the "giver" was exactly what God would have wanted me to have.  Both for my good and for the other's. 

Ever since this lighning bolt I have realized that, like this abandoned house, it may be up to ME to grow, nurture, love, and fix problems with the people in my life that I desire relationships with.  A little at a time, or a whole overhaul could be in store, but that most of the people I have chosen to be friends with deserve my all.

Why did it take so long to figure this out?

The Calm Before the Storm

Every once in a while I find myself in this weird calm mood.  It's as though nothing can rattle me today.  Usually the spell is broken once real life sets back in.  Once the kids get home from school, there's a whirlwind of activity to help me along with that ;)  Today has been totally relaxing.  After taking the kids to school VERY early, I came back home to clean up the "leftovers" of the evening--shoes in the living room, dishes, and the never-ending laundry.  Then, actually sat and watched a movie--The Holiday.  It was exactly what I needed to see.  A bit of melancholy with a happy ending--and very calm. 

I cherish days like this because-as you are no doubt well aware- I am usually a rather intense person with a lot on my mind.  It's like a mini-vacation for my mind, these calm days.  I don't necessarily have any worries or deep thoughts, just peace and tranquility.  I even showered by the light of my oil lamp-weird, right?

All that to say . . . I just know that I've probably been given this wonderful day in preparation for something.  Isn't that the way it always happens?  It's like having a great trip to the beach and getting the warm fuzzies just to come home to find a beloved pet has passed away or something.  Life just happens like that. 

Well, I'm just going to have to pray harder for a great weekend to come.  I know that I can bring peace in my life in the midst of the storm if I hold God by the hand, because I know He's there with His hand already outstretched and waiting expectantly.  There's nothing in the world like that peace that passes all understanding.

Why do I stress myself out and take back the things I place on the altar on a regular basis?  Human nature?